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Apologies to those bored of the topic now, but this has a number of people including myself fired up.

There is already a demonstration planned outside the VA but Iapos;m not sure that will do enough to enbarass Ben Sumerskill, the Chielf Executive of Stonewall, into realising this isnapos;t just some small group of troublemakers who have nothing better to do but whine about things, which seems to be his view. However, if even one nominee or celebrity refuses to turn up to the event (The Metropolitan Police, itapos;s reported, have already withdrawn their support) because of Julie Bindel, thatapos;s a more major embarassment.

Are there any organisations out there that would feel happy putting their name on the bottom of a letter to the various nominees (I donapos;t mind drafting something for people to approve) pointing out, politely, that Stonewall are anything but champions of diversity? Individuals would be good too but the names of a few established organsations would help make it look less like a bunch of whiners who have nothing better to do. :-)

Another approach is to gather the email addresses/contact details for the same group of people and put them in one place (Ethically, I think I would have to send out a list on request rather than just posting it on the internet) so that people can write to all those we know who have been invited in their own words trying to persuade them to make a stand.

(Now I think about it, perhaps we could get a few badges produced and send them out to nominees, see if we can get anyone to wear some sort of Trans solidarity badge while getting their award...)
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Ahh okay, siew really needs to study. When it comes to things like bio, my attention span totally shortened. Todayapos;s like the best example. Roars. I managed only 2 chapters in like the entire day., like up till now la. N while studying them, i went to sleep HAHA best. N i went to transfer songs to my ipod even better huh. AHAH. Terrible. Siew siew needs to wake up from her daydreaming, the condition seems to be worsening. Ah no, and this morning, i woke up, realising that aapos;s are 2weeks away. N for the first time in my life[really], im feeling scared abt an exam. HMPH. Scary. N in 5 weeks time, everythingapos;s over. I cant quite believe itapos;s all happening so soon. Roars. How i wish i was a student again, those no need to have exams one thou. Haha.

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There is a Japanese phrase: okage sama de - "thanks to all that has made it possible." It is said in recognition that, whatever good thing we might be talking about, it did not happen by itself, or because of us alone. Everything for which we are grateful was born of the actions of more beings, animate and inanimate, through space and time, than it would ever be possible to thank.

Yesterday the temperature did not reach a hundred degrees, and a full moon rose over a cool evening. It is now five in the morning, and an hour ago I mixed blueberries, oatmeal and ginger into a cookie dough and put it in the oven. The smell of baking fills the apartment as I type these words while lying on the couch with a sleeping cat by my feet. In the bedroom sleeps a beautiful, brilliant woman, whose existence renders me agape. Soon I will wake her with tea and fresh cookies, and then we will sit zazen together.

Okage sama de.

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Gah I just came out from the bedroom to find Omen 1 trawling You Tube on my laptop. She was watching some sort of Mufasa/Scar slideshow that at first I was fairly certain was slash. As it turns out, it was all clean, and Iapos;m just a monumental perv. But now it appears my 7-year-old has grokked the scope and purpose of search engines, and Iapos;m going to have to keep an eye on that. BLEURGH.

In more cheerful news (for me) Knuckles just strolled into the kitchen naked and searching for clothes on the table. But oops, I actually got my act together and put the laundry away last night. Sorry, Knuckles <3<3<3
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Let me just give you an idea of my last several months.� Okay actually a briefer on the oxygen beginning and then the last several months.� In November of 2006, Dr. H at Cooks told me to start sleeping with oxygen.� That was a little frightening at first, but I got to really liking it.� His idea was to give me a reserve for the next day.� I got to where I would just put it on during the day whenever I was short of breath - after grocery shopping, carpooling, etc.� In about March of 2007, I started wearing O2 all the time.� At first it is awkward going into public with a tank and cannula on, but after you feel so much better, you donapos;t care.� :)� In May of 2007, I was referred by Dr. H to Dr. R for transplant evaluation, and I never went back to Dr. H.� I LOVE�Dr. H� He is an awesome doctor and a wonderful man, so that was difficult.� I had seen him since I was 17.� Dr. R is just as great, and he has a very different personality.� I donapos;t find myself comparing them at all which is good.� I was evaluated for transplant and "officially" Listed in August of 2007.� I had been on 3 ltrs of O2 for quite a while, and in the last several weeks I had been on 4 ltrs.� When I was admitted to the hospital a month ago, I was doing my PT walks on 6 ltrs, and I ended up on 8 ltrs to keep my O2 sats at 93.� That really made�me mad because I wanted my body to work like I dang well wanted it to.� When your mind doesnapos;t agree with your body, it gets very frustrating.� It was hard to remember that I was limited so much, and I would still try to do things as normal when I could.� Granted I have been basically bed ridden for over a year.� It was exhausting to bathe, and I was wiped walking to the kitchen.� Yes, I could have and should have exercised more, but until you have been there, you will never understand what it is like to only have 16 of your lungs functioning.� My heart rate was getting into the 150s way too easily.� I was so ready to come home from the hospital 17 days ago when I got that fateful phone call.� I was never scared for one second.� Never.� I fully credit that to God and the prayers I have given to Him for peace and surrender and the thanks I have given Him for the bountiful blessings I have recieved.� My family and friends are the most amazing people on the planet, and I am honored to even know them much less be related to them.� Trust me I can be a pain.� The first days after transplant were rough.� I had such pain that one day I broke down crying 3 times.� I NEVER�cry, so KissyBot knew it was bad.� Each day has been more amazing than the next, and the journey is just beginning.� Here I am on day 17, and I walked a flight of stairs today� I walked all my laps and my pulse never got over 125 on the stairwell climb.� My sats stayed 98.� That is some perspective folks. :D

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Yesterday, I got my homework done just as�John called me. It was great timing because I probably wouldapos;ve had a hard time concentrating knowing he was waiting on me to get done.�Regardless, I went over to his house around 10ish last night. While I�was there, he said something really surprising to me.

"I�want to talk. Iapos;m afraid our relationship is going to just be physical, and then when that gets old, weapos;ll have no real relationship."

what guy says that?

It made me feel really good that he actually cares that our relationship is more than just physical. It was just kind of surprising because weapos;re in the beginning stages of our relationship; we donapos;t see each other every day; we are extremely attracted to each other; and we DO talk. I�think he was thinking of it in the way that when we are physically together, we like to have fun rather than sit down and have a conversation about life. We always talk about how our day went/what we did. I�just hope the passion doesnapos;t go away because he wants to talk more than makeout.�

Heapos;s right though. I�would say on the whole when we spend time together, we kiss more than talk. But itapos;s fun Iapos;ll try harder... Iapos;m just extremely attracted to him and want to be all over him when weapos;re alone. Haha.. Thatapos;s so me. Anyway, just wanted to mention that.�

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Jason talked me into watching the final debate. I think he no longer loves me.



Personal politics be damned, McCain has now said so many stupid things that I think heapos;s too senile to be president. I kinda like how undecided Ohio voters are still being shown on CNN. I also think that if youapos;re still undecided at this point and planning to vote, youapos;re a fucking moron.



Even sadder, I am now out of beer. I drained the bottle in about 2 minutes. Drinking games be damned.
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